On Boundaries - Week 1 & 2 of Married Life

Photo credit goes to Morgan Blake. 

Photo credit goes to Morgan Blake. 

About two weeks before our wedding, I started reading Boundaries. I’m so appreciative of what I’m learning from that book. With two rings on my finger, I feel a teensy bit more confident about maintaining my own boundaries, saying no, and protecting the space I want to maintain for creative work and my family of two. 

The first week of our marriage was absolutely perfect. We had the best time adventuring in East Nashville. We traveled light, bringing only essentials. Walking and biking whenever we could. We were together, and we were free. Every morning, we walked to the bakery on the corner and had coffee and something delicious. It was so nice to sit near the window and watch people start their day.

The second week has been perfect in its own way. We’re back to life in our home, welcomed by roommates, our pup, our things. Mornings are starting out with a bleary eyed scramble to get ready for work. Dustin and I are beginning to explore what it means to be a family. We are thinking about what traditions we will create and what boundaries we will set.  

Though it seems counter intuitive, I’m positive that good boundaries help us to create our best work. Remember high school art projects and all the requirements? Those were really boundaries. Those rules gave us a safe working space for our ideas. Without them, we wouldn’t have known where to start or when to finish.

Good boundaries help us choose the right opportunities for us. Not every conference, client, gallery, or handmade shop is right for our work. It’s easy to say yes to every opportunity when you’re just starting out - you’re in make-every-dollar-you-can-while-you-can mode. Take some time to chart out where you want to end up. Find out how others got there, and only say “yes” to opportunities that fit within your path. The beginning is the best time to set some boundaries and help yourself to choose strategic opportunities.